a true Londoner?

I've been thinking lately about what makes 'imports to London' true Londoners. I'm sure that true true Londoners would argue that they are the only true Londoners but what if they've never left their square mile? or what if they've left their square mile just once- only to never leave it again?

Eating a curry in Brick Lane does not a true Londoner make. Nor does having a postcode within the M25. Or shopping at Brent Cross.

I think I've endured well these last 6 years. I shop regularly at Liberty (albeit only for the fabric, plates and mostly during the sale!), I don't call the tube lines by their colours (anymore), I have a regular waxer, hairdresser (although she's not in London!) and local Indian restaurant- where I am known as ‘Ms Tracy’ and have special things made for me. I pay Richmond’s exorbitant council tax. I attend quarterly neighbourhood meetings and I vote in the local elections. I know how to get to Waterstone’s via the Cricketeer and the Sun.

I have locked in to my energy supplier to ward off the forecasted 30% increase. All of my appliances and anything that requires a plug have UK sockets and I have developed my own accent of mixed nationalities over the years away from my homeland.

I still call Canada 'home'- but I call New Zealand 'home' as well, and of course there is 'home' where I sleep every night. It gets a bit confusing for others, I am aware, but it's all home to me. London is one of those places- home.

So aside from the fact that I rarely go shopping in the city (and usually take a map with me when I do go) I do know where things are, I know how to plan a trip to town and I know where not to buy stuff...and where bargains can be found or made.

I digress. This has become more about living in the UK than being a Londoner.

Although I don't have a car of my own anymore (thanks to the lovely Polish painter and his son who hit me), I do have access to a car when I want (or need) one- because I belong to a car club. That's pretty urban isn't it? You book it, you use it, you don't worry about the rest. Petrol magically appears...and so do the dents in the door and the scratches on the boot...but after a while those magically disappear. All the glory of using the car, none of the worry about owning a car.

I've been on the London open-topped bus tours more times than I can now count- so I know where the tourist attractions are, where to take visitors, where to sit and when to look. Most true Londoners wouldn't know half the cool stuff that I know about their city- and I love that!

I can (almost) tell time by the flight of airplanes overhead. Lots and it’s day, not lots and it’s night.

I still don’t know how to appreciate a good pint of ale (I recently took a pint back to the bartender because it was ‘flat and warm’ and he said ‘it’s supposed to be’ and I ended up giving the pint to James- who was pretty pleased- and went back for a cider- at least it was cold and bubbly!) so yuck. But not all Londoners drink ale. And I don’t like mushy peas, cod (wormy) with my fish & chips- or any of the crappy shows on the telly that seem to be programmed into the brains of my London friends (sorry girls)- but mostly they are not from London either so maybe it’s just a national love of extremely bad UK-made tv shows that I have not acquired. And I don’t wish to either. I once watched a whole 30 minutes of Coronation Street, Eastenders and Holby City before I vowed to never EVER watch any of them again. I’m sure there’s one other in the mix but I can’t remember it- that’s how bad it was.

So. I don’t chat with strangers on the bus or the tube (they never chat back unless they are foreign or old) and I don’t make eye contact when I’m walking down the street anymore- Londoners don’t do that. I give up my seat to those who need it more than I do- and I put my rubbish into a bin- or hold onto it until I find one- which sometimes isn’t till I get home. I have the utmost respect for bus drivers and always say ‘thank you’ when I get on and get off the bus- because they get me where I need to be safely (mostly) and timely (sometimes).

So there it is. I think I’ve passed the test but maybe I’ve just acclimatised.